It's so uncontrollable. I mean, people always have their reason why YOU'RE alone. Like: "gods got the right one waiting for you." "he'll come when you least expect it, and you're too expecting." "you have to love yourself first."
Take in all the advice. Absorb it. Live it. And still desperately alone.
But then you wake up and think, "I'm not hungry today." and just like that, something's in your control. It's so easy. It's a simple math of counting calories. And mention start to stare because you look hotter the thinner you get. And for a second, you think it's the part of love you can control. Attraction.
But then you find yourself alone at night, starving. And it hits you that love doesn't matter. Your weight does.
Where is this love that everyone wants/needs/worships? Because I don't feel it and the thought of feeling it scares me. Because I won't be able to control it. I can control my hunger.
No comments:
Post a Comment